Bear Grylls vs. blue suede hiking shoes

Ratchet should be shaking a leg at school today in hopes of landing the part of Elvis in their fifth grade musical review scheduled for next month.  He's half hearted about the whole thing because there are no big speaking roles-just music, music and more music.  Apparently he prefers acting to singing though he did do both in last years production of  'Santa's Ho Ho Ho Down' (or something to that effect), where he enjoyed a little taste of fame after playing the Bearded One himself with a full bellied chortle and ad-libbed dance jig that surprised and thrilled the audience toward the end of the show.  

This year, the only part that interests him is the Elvis number.  So, as any scary stage mom would, this morning I made him show me what he was going to do at the audition.  Nonplussed by the idea of becoming Elvis in his own kitchen at breakfast time, he stood there and dutifully sang 'Teddy Bear'.  Well, this wouldn't do as you can imagine, so I  was forced to get up and show him the wide legged bent kneed stance he was going to need to pull off a believable impression.  After seeing his mother gyrating around in the kitchen with arms quaking out to the sides, his skepticism about my Elvis knowledge increased.  What else were we to do than consult the all knowing Youtube for a proper instructional on The King.  I think Ratchet was surprised to find Elvis doing many of my same actions only in such a way that they didn't really look so redonkulous coming from him.  I can't imagine.  I guess we'll see soon enough how it all turns out.  I told him that in a class of 300 or so kids, there were bound to be a few good Elvis impersonators, so he'd better bring his "A" game for the ladies in the room.  I told you I was scary. 

Speaking of characters we pretend to play. Yesterday we took a picnic dinner and went on a short woodsy hike outside of town to get a feel for the new "Outdoorburg" persona we are working on this year.(It doesn't come entirely naturally for some of us.) While waiting on our wandering leader who was going ahead for a quick check, I made Ratchet do his Man vs. Wild-Bear Grylls impression for me.  Because he was in serious hiker mode, he didn't really get into it as he sometimes does. But you'll get the idea.  Be careful with the volume though as Dandy does some impromptu yelling at the beginning and I'm not exactly quiet in stage mom mode myself..  

Life is a stage you know.  A tick infested stage.