Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A Mid-year Evaluation of My Personal Smartering Journey.

I'm a little disheartened today as I write this for it seems I've had a slight setback in my progress.  What progress you asked? 
Well, it all started at the beginning of the year when I bravely resolved that this would be my YEAR OF INTELLIGENCE!!!(igence, gence, gence) And it seemed like things were going along well enough.  There were no glaring problems anyway. 
  •  I have done a complete and thorough Bible Study(Good good, that means I am moving toward my goals of Biblical knowledge.  But not pridefully mind you-no never that.)
  •  I have decided NOT to point out everything I don't know in passing conversation,  but instead just nod sometimes like I'm thinking and filled with opinions on the topic.  This may not be intelligence per say, but it's being more intelligent looking which will help any actual gained intelligence be more credible later.  Sounds smart doesn't it?  I know.  Oops, I'm over in the pride camp now-drat.
  • I have been working toward figuring out my own personal abilities (i.e. encouragement, marketing, clowning for the young-I knew that workshop would come in handy one day, empathy-so sorry you have to endure this post, volunteering to help with stuff, losing weight by muscle atrophy due to not eating and/or moving as often).  AND THEN utilizing those abilities in my daily life, rather than always striving to have someone else's skill set (i.e. organizational talents, getting up at dawn, thinking nice thoughts in the morning, loving to garden, understanding politics, being a "hottie" with ripped abs- etcetera) you get the point.
  • Watching WAY less television and listening to entertaining if not ALWAYS educational podcasts on my Nano instead.
  • My favorite new smartification this year has been having a blog!!!  Of course, that comes with all the pitfalls of wasting huge chunks of my book reading time. But reading your exciting blogs and writing my own silly one has in fact made me just a tiny wee bit more intelligent! Yeah!  That's progress baby! 
But then today as I was trying to "shop smarter" by avoiding Wal-Mart and all its pitfalls of money sucking temptations, I think I did something wrong.  I've been enjoying running by BRAUM'S(an ice cream and fast food restaurant chain) for their hormone free milk and eggs for a while now.  Then they expanded their store to include one produce/meat aisle and one more tiny freezer then a couple shelves of bread, cereal and chippies.  This all sounds perfectly harmless and even convenient for a drive by situation.  But apparently people don't go there for their entire grocery load.  I got a cart and filled it with several meals worth of items, all the while patting myself on the back for the uncharacteristic speed in which I was gathering groceries.  

Then, I turned the tiny corner to the checkout station and started laying out my food.  The store manager came over and excitedly said "Have you heard of our special?!"  I said "No."  And she proceeded to tell me that with a $20 dollar purchase or more, and I was surely going to hit that mark, haha, I would receive a FREE ice cream accessory product.  A what?  She explained that meant popsicles or nutty bars or something.  Not a tub of ice cream, but an accessory that would look nice with(?) it.  

"Ok." I smiled and went to grab an accessory.  Then she finished ringing me up and her eyes lit up like she had just pulled the lever on her cash register and hit the jackpot.  I strolled over, nutty bars in hand, and went for my debit card, when she had another epiphany right there in front of all of us.  I had just bought the most groceries in a fast food restaurant that she had apparently seen someone purchase in her few months as manager.  She said "WAIT A MINUTE!  You are allowed a free ice cream accessory product for EVERY twenty dollars you spend here!  I suddenly realized I  needed to go pick out three more accessories for an entirely blinged out fleet of paper grocery sacks full.  
Now that she too had counted up how many  treats I had earned with my 7 minute shopping spree, the nice lady was beside herself with thoughts of sales awards and promotion.  She rushed over to the freezer section and started telling me all the combinations I could get and what they were worth.  I accepted one of the combinations after she stressed how entirely $free$ they were, but at this point I was actually getting a little shocked and embarrassed.  
I felt like spotlights were on me and confetti had just fallen from the ceiling tiles from the extravagantly UN-clever way I had just bought all my groceries at a FAST FOOD JOINT! 
 Oh, the shame I felt as Joyce-I knew Ms. Manager by name now- summoned an ice cream scooping young man over to help me with my sacks and sacks of her grateful merchandise.  As she handed me my receipt, she gave me a full eye contact locked gaze and said "We surely appreciate YOU".  What could I say back but how much I felt the same(But thinking "What on earth have I done.  And where did all of these balloons come from."). 
This scene didn't have an intelligent feel to it at all.  In fact, I was shaken to the core as to how "last year" this type of behavior surely must be for me.  
Once I thought it out though, I did have quite a few meal options and other than the ice cream bars and the impulse Cheetos purchase (that no doubt took me over the edge into the fourth free accessory item), they were all fairly healthy. 

 And if I were at Wal-Mart, wouldn't it have taken me that earlier 7 minutes to park and enter the building then another hour of zoned out strolling through each department getting a lot more of basically the same stuff in lesser quality?  Maybe. Yes. But why wouldn't I run into other budget conscious people whilst shopping at Braums if this were true?  Yep, that's what I thought.  Not too real intelligent now is I?  Ah well, it IS a process?  Now.  Who'd like a nice cold accessory?  I have plenty!


dive said...

You are such a smartyboots, Shan. Don't try to deny it!
By the way, I loved the echo on "intelligence". Hee hee.

Shopping in America is weird and scary.
Do you really have to go out of your way to find hormone-free food there?
Over here, growth hormones and antibiotics in "factory" meat are banned, together with GM crap (much to the US government's annoyance). Even my little village store only sells organic and free range food.
That really is a shocker, Shan.

Tally said...

Shan! You did what I've always dreamed of actually supported the "little guy"! I am so impressed!!! I know how much you love WM, so this is doubly impressive. I expanded to getting half-n-half there too. But that's about it. It sounds like Joyce may have busted out a couple tears once you left. What a great day for her! I don't see where you made a 'not smart' move on this one.

MmeBenaut said...

Hormone free ice-cream! Yay, I'm coming over.

Jamey Clayberg said...

Ha ha, you're a funny lady... Good post.

Shan said...

Dive, yes you DO have to go out of your way to get anything "natural" in the U.S of A. I'm afraid. We are ALL about convenience and that means if it's quicker to pump a cow or chicken to the brim with steroids and sawdust to get them on the chopping block sooner then by golly let's do it!

Mme B. seams to have the same trouble in Austrailia. Hi Mme B! Come on over for a deliciary!

we also only just now started recycling Dive so we seem to be behind on these considerations.
I still love America for many other reasons though(just so I don't risk sounding like a Dixie Chick).

Trisha I knew I would make you proud. Har-har. But I mainly avoid Wal-Mart to avoid overspending. I am a self centered American after all.

Aw shucks Hubby. I try to keep my funnies up even if my looks are fading. ;)

Jenna Jean said...

Did some one say FREE!!! I'll be all over that. Your the smartest Shan I know! I enjoyed the read!

Shan said...

Jenna J in the HISOUSE! It will be funny when Sara reads your comment about free ice cream. WAHHHHH!
I appreciate how you think I'm smart little one. And I hope you know tons of other Shans-but I've never really heard mention of any. :)

dean r said...

Shan, you got it girl, whatever with the more intel thingy. hau
(uh trish, Braums is hardly the little guy! ha)
so you go straight from supporting locals at the farmers market to the big overpriced guy at Braums???!!! ha ha j/k.
hey keep asking questions, thats what keeps us learning, don't ever stop you cutie.
when is your next stage performance, I want to hear more about those 2008 plans...... hmmm
:) later pickledoo.

Shan said...

Dean! You must be up for breakfast as I am checking my final mailings of the day and off to the bed sack! You are so sweet to me these days. You simply MUST miss our little duets round the pie-ana. I do...sniff. I don't know about Sager Creek. Now that I have aspired to running it, the acting in a measly role just seems well...time consuming and a little bit scary. Never say never though. That's for shuah. XXOO
Oh! And if you even read this... The LOTR spoof is awesome. I'm saving them to watch entirely with Ja. :D

WendyJanelle said...

You are hilarious!! Oh, this made me laugh so hard! I want to be "that kind of intelligence." Oh, yeah, baby, bring on the free stuff!
And, you know, most people just don't realize that Braums has great food AND great prices. I always get the produce with the $1 of coupon stuck to the packages. I got lettuce for 25 cents the other day. (I'm sure Joyce was thrilled.)

WendyJanelle said...

Oh, and I love the echo, too. Just too funny. Your mind works in mysterious (and hilarious) ways.

Jules said...

Am going to save your post to my desktop and take time to read it - with a Cold tablet - achoo!!!

Shelley said...

Oh Shansie, how COULD I be moving away from you? Did you get those sweet rolls we had yesterday as an accessory too? Cuz THEY were an intelligent choice.

You bring out my loud guffaws, my friend. Funny, funny, funny was this post, said Yoda.

Missy said...

Oh Shan, you crack me up! And Dude, Braum's is the shizzle!

And by shopping from Braum's and not the big evil empire that begins with W, you have unknowingly supported my husband's company in a small but very much appreciated way. So see, your food shopping smarts helps keep food on other people's tables too. Good going!

Shan said...

So it's working? I AM SMARTERER? OH this is thrilling indeed! You guys have made my week! Perhaps even my YEAR OF....well you know. I don't want to wear it out.

Scout said...

Sometimes you just get caught up in the moment—it's happens to the smartest of us. Yesterday I got online to order a Brazilian soda my daughter likes and wanted to serve at her graduation party. Before I knew it, I was charge $40 just for shipping, and the stuff is coming from California.

savannah said...

very funny post, sugar! i had my first wally world experience for this year yesterday! had to pickup something for someone else, but somehow, some makeup just seemed to fall into my buggie!! (it was just so inexpensive!) ;-)