As I was stumbling through a hideous pile of leather and man-made materials this past weekend, I thought it might be fun to share with you one of my secret shames of the material world.
Yes, I'm afraid 87 is not only the year I graduated from high school, it has also become the giant, and to some, ghastly number of mediocre shoes I own. While sitting atop the lurching pile on Saturday wondering which poor soles should stay and which should go, I realized each and every little(ok, hoofer sized)pair of my shoes has healed it's own place in my slowly swelling heart.
How do I send any one of you away oh faithful land-foot separators? Even you, denim buckle top with the dog chewed corner sole? We've had some good times together. Remember when I slipped off of you sideways, scraping the whole piece of thick skin from my heal? Then I sort of flapped it back on hoping for reattachment. And it mostly worked! Yeah, that was a scary messy day that I'll not soon forget.
And you, you sneaky cross-trainer. It was you I chose to wear for a simple backyard frolic- right into the hole that broke my ankle. So much for the "sensible shoe" label doctors try to give you. That time we had to hop back into the house so I could take a quick bath and good-foot-it over to the emergency room for x-rays and a big black boot.
And don't even get me started on you slippery little flip flops! Of which one of you, who shall remain nameless, contributed to the porch slipping wrist snapping fall of '04 that kept me from getting my first foster baby(later to be known as Dandy) for six weeks!
I'm not mad at any of my darling shoeys though. We've had some blistering good times together. I've definitely had my share of tall shoe incidents as well. I've done many clever wipe outs with subtle ground level changes underfoot.
But nothing can match the exhilaration of strolling through a store with several inches added to each leg, peering over the tops of other shoppers in wizard to hobbit scale. It's gloriously powerful. I like to help the small bare and hairy footed shoppers reach things on the tippy top shelves while strolling down the toilet paper aisle.
But enough about me, let's get on with my collection shall we? Here's a little rounder of some of what I like to call my "Barbie Shoes", although I feel certain their sheer size alone would disqualify them from anything so feminine sounding. They are all however properly bedazzled and ball gown ready.
Here's a pair I'm pretty proud of. What makes these twins special is that they are not twins at all but merely siblings! One is a whopping size 10 while it's mini-me is merely an 8 1/2. I discovered this one day at church while at first thinking my shoes were a little small, then later, re-looking and finding them actually quite roomie! BAHHA! I still wear them though because I am able to reach across size lines and set my mind somewhere in between. I know, how very big of me.
Here are some other groupings of Shan shoes:
We have the winter line.
A colorful batch of flip-ems.
A motley mix of useful and uglies. The ones I tend to live in are the tall dark blue flips with turquoise swirls. Got them at an outdoor store several years ago and they may actually never wear out. May they never!
And here are some of the more closeted ones(poor dears):
In my way of wanting to start new fashion forward trends, I toyed around with an idea this weekend to keep my footwear looking fresh on a shoestring budget. I find it to be quite gangsta.
It's right up there with my earcuff and rubber tie ideas. Is it not?
And now I'll leave you with the five year old Dandy modeling one of my boots to give a feel for how Gandolfian my shoes actually are.
How many wizard or barbie sized shoes do you have?