Thursday, April 3, 2008

A Somewhat true and truly long tale about myself

I haven't been particularly inspired to write anything lately but I'm about to leave my computer for a long weekend and I DID want to give a tiny bit of an advertisement for the local playhouse in town. 
Last Saturday, Ratchetboy and I went to the Sager Creek Arts Center to see a dear young friend of ours make her acting debut in a play called " The Somewhat True Tale of Robin Hood".  It was REALLY entertaining!  I can highly recommend this youth production!!  Not only is one of the fawning ladies perfectly fetching, but the whole play is actually quite lol funny!

Ahhhh, the Sager Creek Arts Center.  
 There's something about that place that can really bring out the "Big Shan" in me!

 The second I walk in that door I AM CONFIDENCE!  I am a public relations specialist.  I am a  Resident Thespian workin' that lobby like a one woman show!  I have no idea why this happens but it's magical :D.

Probably because I  myself have performed on that very stage as a Dog, a Prop director, a Russian man, a Can-can dancer, and a Quilter!  And it was all BAD! Well, some of the shows were Ok (in a 'Waiting for Guffman' kinda way).  And I was particularly good as a Russian man!    It's not anywhere close to Broadway (well, actually it's quite close to a street called Broadway but you know what I mean.) It IS however The Thee-ah-tah, and a place where I can be...well a dog and other stuff like.. er...Hmmm.  That's where the magic part comes in I guess! 

   A few weeks ago the job announcement of Executive Director of The Sager Creek Arts Center, MY Arts Center(coo), came across my e-mail and I became momentarily lost in all the new and clever ways I was going to run that place!  I had fresh ideas for funding and recruiting local interest groups including our towns large population of  home schoolers!  I WAS ON FIRE FOR THIS POSITION!!  I was yelling "Can I get an Amen!" to myself in the shower as I thought out all the possibilities.  I even raced downtown and asked the ladies there about the opening Big Shan style while they looked at me sideways and handed me the same job description I had already received, and gave a casual request for a resume'. 

 A couple days later when I was jotting down notes for my cover letter, I realized "Wait a minute! You don't want a job during the Summer!  Sure, the kids are in school NOW but soon very soon they will be home all 30 of those hours you are mentally committing to and you don't even WANT a job right now. For that matter, when have you ever run a business before in your life? Done a spreadsheet?  You don't really even understand the concept of a budget!!  Just because you could play the part of an Executive Director in a bad local production of  'The Theatre Company' doesn't mean you could actually do it!" DOH! 

 Delusions of Grandeur or just too much time on my hands?  Both? Ok, yes. I'm stickin' with my "magic of the stage" theory on this one

For the most part in real life I tend to go the shy and quiet route avoiding as much "hands on" time with strangers as possible.  I have been known to do things like NOT go to hairstylists if they work alone and rely on ME for conversation throughout the appointment.  Sometimes I won't even brave the grocery store in my town that provides the service of carrying one's bags 40 paces to the car because of the silent pressure to mention the weather or the heaviness of my food  to the young sacker walking my bags out to the car.  Who could possibly stress about this?  I'm a little bit of a paradox that way.

 I guess it's the off off broadway small talk combining with shyness that really makes me nervous.  I can come across as uber-confident in a crowd, a crowded theatre perhaps. But separate me from the pack and I'm a wounded wildebeest gimping along with all of my achilles heals gleaming, well exposed in the sun.  And let me tell you that can be pretty eye catching in a parking lot. 

 Once I get past that initial level of interaction with people in person I tend to do a little better with the chit chat.  At this point in our aquaintence,  I would definitely let you do my hair.  But, don't expect to be invited over for dinner (especially if you know nothing about hair and I'm recovering from our last get together)  because I would still feel like I need to at least somewhat impress you with my house and/or culinary offerings.

  And since I prefer self deprecating to impressing any day of the week,  I'll simply say I'm just not woman enough to entertain well at this juncture in our friendship. 

If however you have hung around long enough to get to know the girl I've often referred to as "Big Shan" a.k.a. "The Shan", or if I met you at the Arts Center,  you may not be able to remember that there is a shy bone in my body and you may even begin at this point to wish there was, or at least wish for  a quieter one.  "Just one, Biggie Shans? Can you please just tone the amp back down to 10 this one time?"  I hear ya. 

Oh dear, I've gotten terribly sidetracked and  started yet another counseling session with myself when that was clearly not the purpose of this post.  I DO apologize.  

So, this weekend, run don't walk good townfolken!  And take YOUR kids to see a fun version of Robin Hood. It plays Friday and Saturday night @ 7:00 and has a matinee at 2:00 on Sunday.  I promise not to be there!!! 


WendyJanelle said...

Thanks!! We just may do that. I LOVED the last production we went to.
I'm wondering if some other part of me could prossibly be successful up on stage? Hmm... I'm melodramatic enough at home.

You are a VERY hilarious and entertaining writer. Why not freelance for a newspaper or magazine? Then you could have your cake and eat it, too, as far as the job front goes. Just a thought...

The Shan said...

Thanks Wendy! I can't believe anyone can endure my blithering to the end sometimes! I think your writing is very refreshing and honest. I quite enjoy your colorful posts as well! In fact I stole your color and size changes after I FINALLY figured out how you were doing it. I'm still a blogging for dummies candidate.

Tally said...

Along the lines of you and theater, have you been over to PC's page lately? He's got an excellent post about his recent scrape with stage fame.

I still think you need go after that job! If for no other reason than our town needs you!!! You are the one! You are NEO!

dean r said...

go for the job, then just refuse it for time reasons in summer. but then leave them hanging with your name in the basket, and all your ideas left on the table for what you can do! or not...
hey good post, I like all Shans the whole kit and kiboodle.
oh and dentist assistant shan was the most fun I've ever had at the dentist... or was it the gas? ha

sarah cool said...

dude, girl. you crack me UP!!!!!

Shelley said...

Oh, I am QUITE the fan of Big Shan!

Maria said...

I do that about jobs too! I volunteer at my daughter's school and someone is always trying to recruit me for some sort of activity. I have rheumatoid arthritis and I can barely keep up with my own garden at home, but I signed on to help build and tend the compost pile at the school. What was I thinking?

Anonymous said...

I LOVED every line of this :) I have so many blogs to catch up on! I'm so bad....can't maintain my life :P